the success principles – principle 3 – decide what you want

if you haven’t read the other principles, i suggest you start with the first: the success principles – 1st principle – take 100% responsibility

“The indispensable first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: Decide what you want” – Ben Stein
It may be obvious but it’s worth noting that one of the main reasons people are not getting what they want is because they haven’t decided what they want or haven’t defined it clearly and in details. Remember when you were growing up and other people kept telling you don’t do that, you can’t have that, you can’t have everything you want just because you want it… well that probably led you to finally loose touch with the needs of your body or the desires of your heart, and left you like many people today not knowing what you want.

So, how do you change that? Stop settling for less than you want. This is a habit, so to get rid of it the best way is to replace it by the opposing habit, start making choices again, stop saying ‘whatever’ or ‘I don’t know’, when you are confronting with a choice, act as if you have a preference. Remember you deserve to have everything in your life exactly the way you want it.

Here are few ways you can reconnect with what you truly want:

  • make a list of 30 things you want to do, 30 things you want to have and 30 things you want to be before you die.
  • ask a friend to help you make an ‘I want’ list: have your friend ask you ‘what do you want’ for 10-15 minutes and right down all the answers. By the end of the exercise, your wants will be more true expressions of your core values.

People often don’t think they can make a living out of what they love, however most of the time you can. Let’s make a list of 20 things you love to do, and the following principles will show you how to make money at it.

if you check back the complete title of Jack Canfield’s book, you’ll see that it includes ‘how to get from where you are to where you want to be‘. Well in order to achieve that you’ll need to know 2 things: where you are and where you want to be. Therefore you need to clarify your vision of your ideal life, ie: describe what your destination looks like and feels like in the following seven areas: work and career, finances, recreation and free time, health and fitness, relationships, personal goals, and contribution to the larger community. Don’t worry about how you’re gonna get there, just figure out where ‘there’ is.

Once your vision is clear, you just need to lock it in with goal-setting, affirmations and visualizations, then your inner GPS will keep you on track and get you there.

Don’t limit your vision in any way, let it be as big as it is, as Michelangelo said: “The greater danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it”. Or as General Wesley Clark put it “it doesn’t take any more energy to create a big dream than it does to create a little one”. One of the few differences between the superachievers and the rest of the world is that the superachievers simply dream bigger.

Robert Fritz (author of “The Path of Least Resistance”) said “if you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is a compromise.”  Don’t let anyone talk you out of your vision, many will tell you that you’re crazy, that it’s not possible… don’t listen to them and follow your inner GPS.

Here is an exercise to help you clarify your vision:

(for original resource, please check: the vision exercise)

Sit quietly with relaxing music in a quiet environment where you won’t be disturbed, close your eyes and ask your subconscious mind to imagine (clearly and with pictures as vivid as possible) what your ideal life would look like in the following areas (it is important not to limit yourself in that exercise, don’t worry whether it is possible to get these or how you’re gonna get it):

  • financial: what is your annual income and monthly cashflow? how much savings do you have? what is your net worth? what does your home look like? where is it located? how many rooms it has? what landscape is it sitting in? is there a pool? how is it decorated? What kind of car are you driving? what other important possessions do you have?
  • career: visualize your ideal job, where are you working? what are you doing? what kind of customers do you have? what does your compensation look like?
  • free time: what hobbies do you have? what are you doing with your family and friends in your free time? what kind of vacations do you take? what do you do for fun?
  • health and fitness: what does your physical body look like? are you free of disease? are you pain free? how long do you live? are you open and relaxed? are you full of energy? how much do you weigh? how much do you exercise? do you eat good food and drink a lot of water?
  • relationships: what is your relationship with your spouse, family, closed friends look like? are those relaltionships supportive, loving, empowering? what kind of things do you do together?
  • personal development: do you see yourself learning new things frequently, attending seminars, reading books? do you want to learn how to play an instrument? do you want to travel to other countries?
  • community: what does your community look like? what kinds of common activities take place? what charitable, philanthropic or volunteer work takes place? what do you do to help others and make a difference?

Write down your answers as you go or write them down after you finish the whole exercise. Review the results every day to keep your conscious and subconscious minds focused on your vision. For maximum impact, share your vision with a person you know will be supportive and positive. this will help you clarify your vision even more, and make it feel more attainable. Every time you share it, you strengthen your own subconscious belief that you can achieve it.

Continue to the next principle principle 4 – believe it is possible.

And remember if you want to read the whole book, you can get it here: The Success Principles(TM) – 10th Anniversary Edition: How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be by Jack Canfield

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *